So I pretty much proved to myself beyond a reasonable doubt that I am in fact retarded. Let me explain.
I packed up my bed and bathroom stuff from Jen's this morning and called Jeff to come meet me and get the key. As we were leaving, he said that if I forgot anything, I should call him. I swore up and down that I checked more than twice and I collected everything. I then drove down the block to the laundromat. I reached for my jacket to get the quarters out of my pocket when I realized I had no jacket. hmmm... So Jeff came back and let me into the apartment so I could sheepishly retrieve my belonging.
I did my laundry and walked down the street to say goodbye to my new friend Pete. I ended up spending $8 on a rock (don't ask - it's shiny). I got my stuff out of the dryer and was all set to finally leave New Hampshire.
Everyone kept telling me how cool Portsmouth was, and I still haven't seen the ocean (even though I've been on the east coast for over a month)... so I decided to head that direction before going to Rhode Island. I didn't really know where I was going, but I figured if I kept driving east, I would have to eventually hit water. Finally, I did... I pulled off the road into the first parking lot I saw and grabbed my camera. I was so excited to see the ocean! I took a few pictures and returned to my car when I realized that I LOCKED MY FREAKING KEYS INSIDE!! So I start laughing and this old man walking a little fluffy white dog turned and looked at me funny. I told him I locked my keys in my car and then asked him where we were. I could call AAA but what would I tell them? "Hi, I locked my keys in my car. I'm at the parking lot to the ocean. Come find me" uh huh. So he had no idea what the road was called. He said he thought we were in the town of Rye, but he couldn't be sure. He said there was a Science Center up the road a bit and I could probably find someone to call the police there. I thanked him and walked up the road. Mind you, on one side of the road is the frigging ocean. On the other side there is a stinky marsh. Not really anything around.
I got to the entrance to the state park where the sign said the Seacost Science Center closed at 5. Great. It was 6. At least I had a point of reference. I called 411 and stumbled through asking for the local non-emergency police number. Luckily enough I got an operator who knew the area, and confirmed that I was in fact in Rye. She connected me to the police, who were super nice and said they would send a squad out to help me (who knew some towns' police still did lock-outs??!). However, their 2 squad cars had just responded to an emergency call and it may be a while. I sat down on the pavement and soaked up the warm sun.
An hour later, an officer pulled up. He was amazingly sweet (and totally hot), and tried for quite a while to get into my car. Nothing seemed to be working. After getting out the slim jim (unsuccessfully), he got called away to another accident. He apologized and wrote down a number I could call to get a tow truck, and explained exactly where I was at. Thank you hot cop!
As he sped off with lights on, a kid walked across the lot asking what all that was about. I told him I had locked my keys in my car, but the police couldn't get in and now I had to try to call AAA. My phone was dying. This scared me, so I asked him quickly if he would mind hanging around with me in case my phone did die because I didn't want to get stuck. What a trooper. We sat and waited another hour for AAA to respond. It took the guy quite a while to get in. Note to self: MAKE ANOTHER SPARE AND GLUE IT TO YOUR BODY.
I was finally able to get back into my car!! John (my new friend), suggested we go get something to eat. I was starving, and my plans of making it to Philly were shot since it was already 8pm. I followed him back into Portsmouth. What a cool town! It was entertaining to make fun of the scene kids and wander the streets. He gave up on going to a reggae show to hang out with me. How sweet! He was my personal tour guide. We walked through this super old part of town that reminded me of Brighton, England. We walked through the first settlement in New Hampshire, "Strawberry Bank," and took spooky pictures. He offered to help me find a place to stay, but I had the feeling if I didn't leave New Hampshire right then, I would never leave. The state has been trying to eat me, I swear.
So John, the gentleman that he is, offered to lead me to the freeway so I would not get lost. It was an amazingly random evening - and I'm really grateful for all of the friendly people that helped along the way.
I am now sitting in a park and ride in Rhode Island. I made it! Now I've only got 3 states to visit - Louisiana, Alaska and Hawaii. Awesome. I was almost convinced that Rhode Island didn't exist. Somehow, I ended up driving in an enormous circle before getting here. I missed the turnoff for Providence, and kept driving to Boston. I was wondering how I ended up on 93 instead of 95 and I thought I saw that they joined up again south of Boston, so I kept driving. I had stopped at a rest stop at 11:45 to get some water. An hour and 20 minutes later, I was at the same rest stop for a second time. I felt like I was in the Twilight Zone again. I had no idea how that happened, and even sitting here looking at a map, I can't quite figure out how I made that circle. This is why I'm convinced I'm retarded (other than the fact that I lock my keys in my car and forget really important things).
One thing I noticed: a bumper sticker on the back of a van that said "Masshole" - this made complete sense to me. I said before that Boston reminded me of London, and that I've never particularly cared for Boston. But it's not the city I don't like, it's the people. And really, everyone I've met from Massachusetts... They are complete Massholes. Rad.
I think that's about it. I love the fact that my gas tank isn't leaking anymore. I've driven 195 miles on less than a half tank of gas (this almost makes up for the fact that I drove for an extra hour and a half on the same stretch of road).
Thanks for reading!!
1 comment:
He He she said masshole
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