5.15.2008

2 Horrid Weeks!

I can't believe the LOST season finale is 2 weeks from tonight!! This means no LOST next week! I had 2 dreams with characters from the show this week. What's going to happen in the coming weeks?? I'm going to go crazy. .:GAH:.

So on a lighter note, I got a call the other day offering me a few more days of work at the studio. It's awesome. Maybe I'll have enough money to fix my car and drive back to Wisconsin to get my stuff! Possibly. But either way, I will now have rent for June 1st. It's been a while since I've had to pay rent. Makes me feel like a real human again ;)

I had the realization yesterday that I live in Tampa now, and I got excited. Christina and I were driving to Goodwill and I was looking at the water and thinking about my new apartment (Melanie sent me to look at a couch that was posted on Craigslist - we have a new couch and love seat now!)... I got all excited about being able to ride my bike over the Gandy bridge and along the Bay Shore sidewalk. Letting the fact that I never have to shovel my car out of the snow again sink in... I'm very excited. I like Tampa. It's very different. Nothing like Milwaukee or the midwest. But it's nice. There's a bit of a north-shore feel to the area (which I'm not all that fond of) but I haven't yet felt unsafe since I've been here. I'm even getting used to the heat.

Things started to change when I finally took my bike out the other night. Riding around the inlets near where Mel's parents live made me feel comfortable. It was warm and the air smelled of magnolia - amazingly sweet. I rode out to this point that overlooks the bay and I found myself tearing up. It wasn't a sad cry (even though Snow Patrol "Run" was playing on my iPod); it was more of a settling cry of relief and acceptance. I've had a great deal of change in the last year. It's all turned out exactly the way it was meant to turn out, but change is still difficult. I miss people. I get sad when I think about what things "could have been." But things aren't that way. And I know I tried as hard as I could to salvage and mend what was mine to salvage and mend. I wasn't the only one who worked at it.
Still, it's bittersweet. I am, however, happy at the moment. I've had an absolutely fabulous 2 months getting to know myself again. I've seen some great friends, and made some new ones. I'm definitely not done with my journey - just taking some time here to get to know myself in a new environment.

That being said, I went out a couple more times. Interesting. I think I may have an internet stalker (serves me right!) Tonight I had a lot of fun. I almost didn't go out... I was super exhausted after work and needed to shower. I just wanted to take a nap and watch LOST, but when this boy called, something in his voice made me change my mind. So I met up with him at Panera. He was really sweet and I would love to go into detail, but all I need to say is that I had a good time and I'm looking forward to seeing him again. :)

Now it's just gone midnight and I'm going to sleep so I can get up and iron sheets all day tomorrow. haha! Funny enough, I really like what I'm doing. It's very calming; almost zen-like. But I think I mentioned that once before. Oh yeah, wish me luck - I go into Vinyl Fever tomorrow with my resume. The owner is out of town until Sunday, but a couple of the employees said they would make sure my resume is the first thing he sees once he returns. Apparently I've got good timing.

That's all from the Sunshine State. How's the weather in Milwaukee? do you have leaves on the trees yet??













1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Panera!!!!!!

Panera is literally my all time fave place!!! (Did you have a Dutch Apple bagel? or maybe an asian salad?! mmmmmmm) It makes me happy that you went there and that you've settled in for a bit.

Lots of love from AZ!

-Nikki