MUSE, Vampires and Apollo

For some reason I have found my thoughts collecting into a blog post. I have been trying to force myself to write my book, with little success. My emotions have been too raw to think about so I have forced myself into reading for distraction, however the distraction has been so damn good that I can think of little else!!

I had heard about this Twilight series a while back, but like everything else, I have to try to be cool and not jump on the band wagon. My curiosity finally got the best of me when it was suggested that I find a non-human distraction. I was sucked in immediately (haha. get it? vampire? sucked?)

What's amazing about these books, is not that they are superbly written or immensely creative - because they are not even very original - but that I am able to channel my emotions through them. Apparently this is a healthy was of dealing with things (as pointed out to my by my amazing sponsor). So I have been letting it all come. It's been a painful trip through the relationship in the books - and when I start to cry, I allow myself the tears. At one point I got so upset that I really had to skip to the end and read the last chapter just to make sure I could make it through the painful 450 pages in between. Don't you wish life was like that? That you could just skip to the end? Reminds me of a Futureheads song...

Today I decided I was going to read the entire second book. But like the first, I had to have the second ready to read immediately. I prepared myself by running out to Sam's Club to get the third book. Only they didn't have it anymore, so I made another trip to Target. That damn store is dangerous to my finances. I came back and got myself situated on the couch. I was only about 85 pages into the 2nd book when I started reading this afternoon. I guess somewhere inside I hope the sooner I go through the books and feel my pain, the sooner I will heal. I'm not quite sure it works that way, but I figured I would give it a go.

Nearly 500 pages is what I've read in the last 12 hours. I think it's a record. I didn't even read Harry Potter straight through like this (although I was purposely savoring the final book - drawing out every line because I didn't want that world to end for me). I read through her acknowledgements at the end of my marathon and was astonished to find a special thank you to the band MUSE. Thinking about it now, though doesn't really surprise me that Stephenie Meyer is a huge MUSE fan. It makes so much sense why I would like her books so much. Apparently she attributes some "emotions, scenes and plot threads" to "their genius." Awesome.

So then I did some thinking. I have always been drawn to vampire stories. I have always been obsessed with vampires, really. I think as far back as I can remember I have been a "vampire goddess" or some form of Gothy vampire for Halloween. Last year I made an exception because I could fit into my renaissance dress again. I wore that costume for Halloween the year it was made for me - 2000. But other than those 2 years, I have been a vampire. While we were at Busch Gardens last night, I realized that I had left my vampire fangs in my wallet. Yeah. That's right. I carry vampire teeth in my wallet at all times. Strange? Definitely. When we dropped Corey off I dug them out to show Jen. She was fascinated that they weren't the normal cheesy vampire teeth - that they were caps that actually looked like fangs. I really need a new pair, but these still do the job. LOL

Then I was thinking again about my obsession with vampires. Trying to pinpoint where it started. I suddenly remembered that my favorite book in 3rd grade was Bunnicula (published in 1979 - my birth year - coincidence??). It was a series about a vampire-bunny that sucked juice out of vegetables. I made my mom order all the books in the series for me through the book club. I haven't pried my memory too much further back yet to see if there's some sort of hidden reasoning for my strange preoccupation. I'll let you know if I come up with anything further, though.

After reading the acknowledgements and the other bands Meyers thanks (Travis, Coldplay, and Brand New among the named), I mentioned to James that it sounded like I needed to be Ms Meyers friend. We must have too much in common. I became more curious and went on an internet search to find out how old she was (she's almost exactly 6 years older than me - our birthdays are 3 days apart). Of course I became distracted by information on the books (and I'm sure I read a couple spoilers but at this point I don't even care anymore). In the small town of Forks, WA where the majority of the story takes place, they celebrate Stephenie Meyer Day - which is September 13th - the birthday of Bella Swan, the main character. September 13th also happens to be my sobriety birthday (yeah, I just had 9 years *grins*). Another strange coincidence?

My digging went a little further and I was reading about a comparison of Edward Cullen to the Greek god Adonis. I remembered that Barbara suggested I re-name my car something positive (rather than after the name of a dead character on LOST). I forgot to mention this... I decided to keep the car previously known as Charlie and in making that decision, I smudged and cleansed the vehicle to rid it of all the negative energy from the last 4 months of bad experiences (and previous who knows how long of terribly ownership). I still hadn't thought of a new name. But as I was reading about Adonis, I thought maybe I could re-name Charlie Adonis - after my new obsession with Edward. Adonis is the god of birth, death and rebirth - but also of vegetation. There were more stories that warned me that this wasn't so fitting a name as I originally thought. So I did a search for other Greek gods and goddesses. I had thought previously about Aphrodite, but she just reminded me of my early rave days. But then I started reading about Apollo. Apollo has been variously recognized as a god of light and the sun; truth and prophecy; medicine and healing; music, poetry, and the arts. I could not wish for a better symbol. So thank you Stephenie Meyer for inadvertently leading me to a new name for my little Civic!

I hope you have enjoyed my hopeless rambling. I'm going to dream of vampires and MUSE concerts!